Acknowledge Your Truth: Did They Really Do “The Best They Knew How?”

The phrase we use when we don’t want to let the ones we love take responsibility for hurting us.

“She held herself until the sobs of the child inside subsided entirely. I love you, she told herself. It will all be okay.”― H. Raven Rose, Shadow Selves

At times, when we acknowledge our childhood traumas, we want to let some people off the hook. We acknowledge what was done to us but out of love and self-preservation, we can let those who harmed off the hook with one simple phrase:

“They did the best they knew how.”

Hitting, yelling at a child to the top of your lungs, calling them out of their name, discouraging them, and putting them down is not the best they knew how.

Let’s be honest. Oftentimes, it’s the best they were willing to do at the moment. Their emotions, frustrations, and disappointments with themselves were taken out on you as their act of self-preservation. What they were screaming was:

“I’m hurt. I’m in pain. I’m being inconvenienced. I need to get rid of this hurt and pain so I’m going to take it out…