It does come naturally for us. We hear a tone in a voice and we assume and tell ourselves a story. About two weeks ago, I asked my Bf if he could stop in target on his way to see me and get this house spray I like. He'd seen me buy it before and he liked it and now he buys it too. I told him I would pay him back when he got here.

Well, he took a deep breath and I thought I was bothering him so I said "oh that's okay."

He said, "I'll get it. It's no problem."

I said, Nah, nah. It's okay. I know you're tired.

Then he said, "What makes you think I'm tired. I can get my lady a can of house spray."

It could have been a thousand reasons why he took a deep breath. It didn't have to be because I was "bothering" him.

And if he had not insisted and told me it wasn't a bother, I would have continued with that stupid story. I would have been hesitant to ask him to do anything for me.